Tag Archives: new year

2014: Cracking the Heart Wide Open

Some of the most beautiful and profound experiences of my life occurred in 2014. As I sit in reflection, letting memories and moments float up organically, the impact of said experiences grows and grows…until I find myself literally grounded, on my knees, in awe and humility. This year…wow.

‘Humility’ is not merely the art or the act of being humble…as that word too often implies weakness, smallness, or insignificance. To me, it has come to mean the embodiment of grace…the recognition that I am both tiny and infinite at once. It is being awash in a pool of gratitude so deep that it surpasses any words to describe it. In this sense, it is humility that cracks the heart wide open.

I have changed so much, even in the past six months, that it’s difficult to remember the barriers I had constructed around myself. I peer at their odd details, their remnants, and struggle to recall why they were there to begin with. It’s hard to remember the fear I had, the resistance to my own inner voice. I knew that Hypnotherapy training was the next step in my career as a psychotherapist (and coming to that knowledge was a journey in and of itself)…but for months, I felt stuck. I was learning the way, I was given the tools…but I simply couldn’t make myself DO it. Why wasn’t I ready? If I had to wager a guess…I didn’t believe I had the right to be powerful. I didn’t think I could really be a healer. And my own lifelong fight for authenticity (usually manifesting as perfectionism) made me doubt. I wasn’t sure I could facilitate my own healing, let alone the deep spiritual journey of another human being. Talk therapy is one thing; hypnotherapy, regression, energy medicine and soul work is another realm entirely.

I believe it now. I believe in myself. I believe in this work.

What brings me to tears are the memories of my sessions with clients, colleagues, and friends this year…the profound effect of witnessing another’s spiritual journey: the healing of old wounds, the remembering, the awakening. The relief and the comfort of meeting a wise adult, of feeling ushered and guided through life, of realizing I was never alone. The amazement of encountering a higher power, a force that shows up in a virtual kaleidoscope of forms. The immeasurable joy of learning to comfort your own inner child, to heal wounds you never believed could heal, to reconstruct the origin of false beliefs, and reclaim the self as whole and pure. And that is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg…

We are all, as flawed and embodied beings, under the illusion that we are separate, that we are bad, that we are alone. Heart-Centered Hypnotherapy® offers the opportunity to burst through this illusion and, yes, touch the stars. Burrow into the womb of the earth. Revisit our past and create new decisions about who we are and what we are meant to be in this life. Within the sacred space of Trance, anything and everything is possible.

For those who have already trusted me to be your guide, to accompany you on the journey to your highest self…my deepest thanks to you. To my teachers, my mentors, and my tribe, who continually challenge me to open, release, and BE…I cannot express in words how you have changed my life. To those of you who have yet to decide if this work may be meaningful or right for you…thank you for landing on this page. Thank you for your curiosity and your questions. I firmly believe this work is for everyone…that there is no one who can’t benefit from connecting deeply with their own soul. But ultimately, that is for you to decide for yourself.

Wishing you joy, healing, fulfillment, and peace in 2015. Oh, the places we’ll go…!

New Year’s Absolutions

The interwebs are positively buzzing at the beginning of a new year, both encouraging us to set ‘resolutions,’ and simultaneously telling us we’re doing it wrong. Beware the Ides of January, folks…as it only takes most people a couple weeks to give up on their new year’s resolutions. This is, of course, according to the internet…the truest source of truth (ahem).

I’ve written myself a set of resolutions many times over…some years, my list has been lofty, idealized, and almost silly (complete with hearts and smiley-faces). Other years, I’ve tried to be realistic and pragmatic. Most recently, I’ve foregone lists for a ‘Vision Board,’ which appeals more to my creative side, and focuses on positive intentions for the coming year.

In looking at the types of things I’ve resolved for myself in the past, it occurs to me that they all presuppose that something is missing or wrong in my life. Why else would I want to lose weight, get healthier, fall in love, travel, save more money, pay off debt? These are all positive things, in theory, but the fact that I’ve written them down year after year means I never feel as though I have achieved them. I’m forever “not there yet,” which can easily become “not good enough.”

That doesn’t seem like a great way to start anything, let alone the next twelve months of my life.

Don’t get me wrong: I love words. Words are powerful, not only in how we communicate with each other, but in how we narrate our own experience. But ‘resolve’ has an air of drudgery about it, no? And ‘resolution’ is no better…at the new year, it is used to describe our goals, and even more so, our determination to stick to them. But most commonly, we use the word ‘resolution’ to depict a solution to a problem. We use it to describe a legal process or decision. We use it in mathematics and measurement. Resolution is a way of describing the quality of our digital images and television screens.

Is that really the best framework for pausing and reflecting upon our lives at the beginning of a new year? If so, let’s just simplify our list to the following:

1. Solve all problems that I haven’t figured out how to solve yet.

2. Do everything I haven’t gotten around to yet.

3. Measure up to whatever/whomever I’m comparing myself to.

I have a suggestion. Let’s try out a new paradigm in 2014. How about we absolve instead of resolve? This year, how about we let ourselves off the hook? When we look at our lives through a lens of absolution, we free ourselves from guilt, blame, and punishment. We forgive ourselves for our mistakes, our unmet goals, our lapses in judgment, our messed-up priorities, and our own human fallacies.

I admit…to absolve instead of resolve seems a little harder, doesn’t it? To me, that is a reflection of its importance…to do what is right is seldom easy. The real work often lies below the surface; for example, I want to lose weight this year. But more importantly, I need to learn to love and accept myself as I am, and stop obsessing about my appearance. If I am able to absolve myself of the shame and self-punishment that surrounds my weight…I’m pretty certain that “lose weight” will no longer appear on my list, come January 1st of next year.

So let’s try it, shall we? I propose the following New Year’s Absolutions for all:

1. I forgive myself for (this mistake), (that character flaw) and/or (these imperfections).

2. I also forgive (so-and-so) for (grr-that-was-terrible) and/or (that hurt my feelings).

3. I will no longer make decisions or set goals out of guilt.

4. I will stop punishing myself for (unmet goal), (past loss/trauma), and/or (regrettable decision).

5. I will love myself as I am, and love others as they are.

Happy New Year!